We’ve seen it already this summer.  June brides who tried something new to look special on their big day, only the special look they ended up with was especially a bummer.  So for the rest of you summer brides, (and this goes for mothers and grooms as well) before you say “I do,” there are some don’ts that you should keep in mind:

Of course you want your skin to be bright and glowing, but don’t schedule a facial treatment close to the big day.  If you’re considering a facial or any sort of peel, you have to make sure you give your skin plenty of time to recover, a minimum of a week.  Facials draw out impurities and can lead to breakouts, and if it has been over a year since you had one, or maybe you’ve never had one at all, you must expect some type of skin reaction.  And depending on the level of the peel, the new skin it unveils will be red for several days to 2 weeks.  Make sure there’s time to heal before you walk down the aisle.

Give the same consideration to any facial waxing.  If you’ve never waxed before, just prior to your wedding is not the time to start – at least not with regard to your face.  I regularly wax my chin and eyebrows … and I regularly break out a couple of days later.  Plan accordingly.

Even if your color theme includes orange, it doesn’t apply to your skin unless you are one of Willie Wonka’s Oompa Loompas.  Don’t go overboard tanning, especially if you’re wearing white (and/or strapless).  Fake tans — spray-on or otherwise acquired — are not fixable and they will still be very obviously fake decades later, regardless of how good your photographer is.  Spend the money to try a couple different techniques a month before the wedding, then choose.

Most importantly, don’t go crazy with your makeup, and if you are using a professional, have a makeup rehearsal weeks before the event.  You want to be a blushing bride because you’re excited and glowing, not because you’re over-painted.  Too often, we see brides who go for the extra eyeliner or lipstick or blush because they think the pictures will look better. If you’re taking the stage at the community theater or running off to join the circus, you can make an argument for changing the way you wear your makeup.  But you’re getting married because somebody loves the way you look every day.  “Something blue” should not be your eye shadow.  If you don’t normally wear blush or magenta lipstick, don’t do it for your wedding.  Whether you hire a professional, put your face in the hands of a friend or do it yourself, accentuate the positive.  Enhance what you have, don’t hide it under layers of cosmetics.

When it comes to your wedding day, if you only remember one thing, remember that those pictures you shelled out thousands for are going to be passed down through generations.  Make sure they look like you.

• More don’ts can be found on TheKnot.com.
• Sacremento Magazine has a good list of Do’s.
• WebMD.com features “The Perfect Bridal Beauty Guide.”

“If you’re going to get a bikini wax,” she said, “you might as well get a Brazilian.”

That first rrrrr-iiii-ppppp of the wax-removal material was, let’s say, a wake-up call.  My idea of a Brazilian and the actuality of it were two entirely different things and in my brain that realization was apparently on a 30-second delay.  After the initial “Oh … my … god,” it was all pretty funny, I couldn’t really do anything but roll with it (visualize stopping half-way through – not an option).

A recent article from WebMD was geared toward people contemplating a bikini wax or Brazilian, full of things to keep in mind.  Usually a pretty thorough researcher, I was kind of naïve when it came to waxing anything other than my face, but I can honestly say that if I knew then what I know now, I’d still do it, I’d just make sure the esthetician and I are on the same page.  If you want a bikini wax, it’s kind of like edging the lawn.  The Brazilian is roto-tilling the whole garden.

That summer, my legs never looked better.  They were smooth and soft and sleek for weeks.  There weren’t any “strays” poking their coarse little heads out.  I could wear as much or as little as I wanted without a second thought.  And while I was, um, startled by the process at first, I can’t say it was really painful for me, which was especially surprising because of the extreme sensitivity of my face when it comes to waxing.  There was some initial discomfort, but it wore off quickly.

I’d do it again in a heartbeat, but there have been awkward days at the beach – standing waist-deep in body-numbing water for hours because of a really unfortunate 5 o’clock shadow or grasping for something inflatable or damp with which to cover myself because my garden had not recently been weeded – when I wonder why I didn’t make that waxing appointment.

There are alternatives to waxing, of course.  The most obvious is shaving, because most of us do that already.  It’s just a matter of kicking it up a notch.  Gillette, Schick and even Noxema offer bikini-area trimmers.  And while you can’t use it for extremely personal places, I do like the Smooth Away for my upper thighs.

In terms of results, though, none of those comes close to waxing.  Just remember:  If you want a so-called “landing strip” or “racing stripe,” you have to let the waxer know.  Otherwise, it’s quite an eye-opener.

The study was done on mice who, as it turns out, have similar sex-based fat distribution pattern to humans.  But there were some definite surprises in the data, particularly for the men.

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First, fat tissue is completely different between men and women.  “”We found that out of about 40,000 mouse genes, only 138 are commonly found in both male and female fat cells,” said Dr. Deborah Clegg, assistant professor of internal medicine at University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center and senior author of the study.  Since the substance of fat is so different between the genders, the treatment must be different as well, and in that way, women have the advantage.  “Fat on the hips, thighs and butt is subcutaneous and therefore treatable with liposuction. However, belly fat in men is typically visceral and too deep to be treated with liposuction. The only way to reduce this kind of fat, which is considered a health risk, is with diet and exercise,” New Beauty reports.  Get on those bikes, boys!

But women got some bad news in the study as well, and dang, we knew this all along, too.  “In the female mice whose ovaries had been removed — a condition similar to human menopause — put on the high fat diet, weight gain was greater and more likely to be in the belly,” UPI reports.  So women’s fat cells relocate!  Just when we think we’ve got a solution to our “problem area,” it changes neighborhoods!

But Dr. Clegg gives us some hope.  “Although our new findings don’t explain why women begin storing fat in their bellies after menopause, the results do bring us a step closer to understanding the mechanisms behind the unwanted shift.”

Thanks, Dr. Clegg.  But at the risk of sounding vindictive, I’d feel better if those guys had some kinda “shift,” too.  Just once I’d like to see a man whose fat gut slipped to his backside.  But every woman knows – that ain’t going to happen.  It’s in our genes.

I exaggerate of course, but hand rejuvenation is a new specialty among esthetic professionals for good reason.  While the skin of the face and neck may get all the attention in the fight against aging, the condition of our hands are, as my husband pointed out – a dead giveaway.  No matter how fat your butt is, older hands lose their fatty tissue and look bony and wrinkled.   Hands are often the first thing damaged by the sun, which results in freckles and age spots.  Because they are always in water and being wiped off, skin on your hands is often dry and itchy.  Even the veins stick out more as we age.  Remember the hands of the Wicked Witch of the East?

You get my point.  If hands are your issue, you are not alone.

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The solutions for regaining youthful hands are many.  Product-wise, Retin-A and glycolic acid can be applied to the hands topically, which cause age spots to fade over time, just like they do on the face.  Chemical peels and microdermabrasion are also prescribed for faster results, but will definitely keep you from doing dishes for a few days while your hands heal.  Retin-A products usually run about $60-$100 a tube; the skin resurfacing procedures cost $200-$500.

Processes like laser skin resurfacing for the hands are very popular in medical spas using Fraxel, Thermage, Refirme or IPL, which can remove spots and broken capillaries.  For larger blood vessels, physicians use the same technique they use for spider veins – sclerotherapy – during which a chemical is injected into the veins that causes them to shrink. Dermatologists are even using injectable fillers to temporarily plump bony hands.  Depending on the services you receive, expect to pay $1,500 to $5,000 for these types of treatments.

If you are VERY serious about your hands, you can also go in for soft tissue augmentation where fat cells are taken from other parts of your body and transplanted to your hands. Hand rejuvenation procedures like those usually take place under outpatient anesthesia and are upwards of $1,500-$5,000 as well.

Doctors can bundle the procedures to save you money, but hands down, cosmetic hand rejuvenation could turn into some serious ‘high fives’.

The treatment, sometimes called injection lipolysis, lipozap, lipotherapy or mesotherapy, involves injecting a chemical cocktail into pockets of fat so they will melt away.

“It is important for anyone who is considering this voluntary procedure to understand that the products used to perform lipodissolve procedures are not approved by FDA for fat removal,” says Janet Woodcock, M.D., director of FDA’s Center for Drug Evaluation and Research in a press release issued by the FDA.

According to the FDA, the drugs most often injected for lipodissolve are phosphatidylcholine and deoxycholate (commonly called PC and DC).  The FDA says neither PC nor DC have been evaluated or approved for this use; the safety of the substances hasn’t been determined; and FDA isn’t aware of evidence of effectiveness or clinical studies supporting this use of the products. Further problematic is that some doctors add other substances to the mix, reports Denise Mann for yourplasticsurgeryguide.com. Substances like multivitamins, plant extracts, enzymes, even hormones, antibiotics or anti-inflammatory drugs.

There have also been reports of unexpected side effects like permanent scarring, skin deformation and deep, painful knots under the skin where the injections were made.

Hmmm … if that’s not enough, yourplasticsurgeryguide.com notes that another problem with lipodissolve is that nobody really knows where the melted fat goes.  If it goes to the liver, it could lead to scarring and liver failure; if it goes to the blood vessels and adds to existing fatty plaque, it could increase one’s risk for heart attack or stroke.

And did we mention that lipodissolve only earned a 32 percent satisfaction rate from RealSelf.com reviewers?  A couple of them wrote that the process nearly killed them.   Admittedly there are a few people who rave about about the procedure on RealSelf, but if the FDA feels strongly enough to issue warnings, we should pay attention.  There are plenty of other fat-reducing processes out there.

Lasers can melt away your fat, cut holes in metal and effectively arm Jedi warriors, but they cannot permanently remove your body hair.

The biggest misconception about laser hair removal is that the hair won’t grow back.  It will, and it does, to the surprise of many, even though Websites like those for American Laser Centers say right on the front page: “even the most sophisticated laser hair removal treatments require multiple sessions to ensure full effectiveness.”

Maybe it’s wishful thinking: We hope the lasers will just destroy those follicles at the root like electrolysis does, eliminating those nasty little lip hairs or back hairs forever.  But unwanted body hair is possibly the only thing on this earth more stubbornly persistent (and did we mention unwanted?) than dandelions.  And all that a laser can do is make it dormant for awhile.

According to Dr. Eric Bernstein, writing for The Hair Removal Journal, pigment (melanin) in the hair absorbs the heat of the laser light and goes into a “resting phase.”  No hair is produced when the follicle is resting.  It lasts longer than waxing and most other methods of hair removal, but it doesn’t last forever.

Because lasers target melanin, they are most effective for people with light skin and dark hair.  Darker skin, which contains more melanin, can be permanently lightened by the effects of the laser.  Similarly, lasers aren’t as effective on blond and gray hair, which lacks melanin, says the Mayo Clinic.

On the upside, lasers can be used on just about any part of the body: arms, legs, face (except near the eyes), back and bikini area.  Pain has been likened to the feeling you get when you snap a rubber band against your skin.   The American Society of Plastic Surgeons estimated the average physician/surgeon cost for laser treatments in 2008 was $456, but as with all esthetic processes, that varies by region and procedure. Larger areas like the back can cost upwards of $1,000 per treatment.

And as we mentioned, the number of treatments needed vary depending on the coarseness of the hair and the area being zapped. They are spaced several weeks apart, and then will likely require some follicle follow-up every six to 12 months.

On one hand, it sounds like a lot of work to lose some whiskers. At the same time, when we finally run off to join the circus, we don’t want it to be as the bearded lady.

Let’s get the snorts and guffaws over with: Cosmetic tattooing, or micro-pigmentation, does involve someone sticking inked needles into your face. And, in the spirit of full disclosure, this will be a pro-permanent makeup article.  I immediately went home and had it done.  But I am getting ahead of myself.

The process has many names, but it is the same technique that produced pin-up girls on the forearms of WWII veterans, skulls on the biceps of bikers, and little butterflies on the shoulder of your underage daughter – electric needles are used to inject permanent dye into the skin.  Cosmetic tattooing is used to help with reconstructive surgery, simulate facial hair lost through chemotherapy or alopecia, cover scars or, in my case, address laziness.  I like to wake up with makeup.

Micro-pigmentation uses extremely small pigment granules for coloring on the face or other sensitive areas of the body, because it is for esthetic enhancement rather than art.  Estheticians apply permanent eyeliner, lip liner and full lip color, eyebrow enhancement, beauty marks, areola recreation, as well as scar camouflage.  The dyes used for makeup are different than the ones used for a Grateful Dead logo and the procedure is relatively quick and mostly painless. Depending on the size of the area, it takes around 40 minutes to an hour, and two sessions are needed with a couple weeks in between treatments.  There is mild discomfort, but most specialists use a topical anesthetic to numb the skin.  The cost varies – anywhere from $300-$500 for eyebrows, up to $2,000 for areola work and it is likely that the work will fade after a few years, especially if you spend a lot of time in the sun.

The bad news is that while there are lots of different colors and pigments, “none, including the hair dye henna, are actually approved by the FDA for skin injection,” says WebMD.com.  Risks include infections, inadequate sterilization of the needles, allergic reactions, scarring, and bleeding of the dye into surrounding skin.  The American Association of Blood Banks requires a one-year wait between getting a tattoo and donating blood because of the risk of hepatitis or HIV contamination.  Most states now heavily regulate and inspect tattoo parlors, but consumers should be sure to do their research, check references and above all, make sure the environment is clean.

Having said all that, the results can be fabulous (I told you this was a PRO article.) Tattooed eyebrows, when done correctly, are indistinguishable from real ones.  Faded lips have new color and scars disappear.  I have worn thin eyeliner since I was 12 years old, but sight problems were making it more and more difficult to apply well.  Two sessions and two years later I have positively no complaints and awaken, like the women on my trip, suspiciously well made up.  Now if I could just tattoo out the wrinkles…

Until then, we have a bevy of lipo treatments from which to choose, that get our bodies closer to that ultimate shape. The latest — cryolypolysis – is a non-invasive procedure for people already in pretty good shape who can’t quite seem to erase that last pouch of fat.

Cryolypolysis, sometimes referred to as Zeltiq or LipoFreeze, is a method of cooling fat cells, which then die and are carried from the body by white blood cells.  Being non-invasive, the only suction going on with this lipo is done by the vacuum device placed on top of the skin that cools the fat cells.  Despite the name, the cells aren’t literally frozen, they are just made cold enough to crystalize and croak, rendering them waste management for the white cells.

Because cryolypolysis is new, there isn’t a lot of information out there and it hasn’t yet been reviewed by any third-party, trustworthy sources that LookinGood uses.  Further, The Zeltiq device [pronounced Zel-teek] is not yet FDA approved for fat reduction, although it is OK’d for anesthetic and skin-cooling purposes.  In an article in Cosmetic Surgery Times, two physicians interviewed said that in most patients studied, the results of the procedure were noticeable after two or three months.  The doctors interviewed, however, are both on the  Zeltiq advisory board.

Doctors who answered questions about Zeltiq on RealSelf.com, however, suggest that two or three cycles may be needed. Some charge separately for some areas: love handles (or flank) or the back, for example. One cycle could be the left side and another cycle could be the right side. Costs vary by surgeon and region of the country, but generally range from $600-$900 per cycle.

What is clear from the information out there is that:

• Cryolypolysis isn’t for large areas of focus.  It is a procedure to reduce small pouches of fat.
• It isn’t a treatment for cellulite.
• It is currently limited in scope to flanks, bellies and possibly male breasts.  It isn’t effective on thighs or upper arms.
• After-effects can include temporary tingling in the treated area; temporary loss of sensation from the Zeltiq vacuum and hickey-like red marks that disappear after a couple of days.

There are some aspects of LipoFreeze that we can really warm up to, especially as compared to other lipo body sculpting methods. It targets a specific area and the surrounding tissue remains unaffected.  There’s also the possibility of it being a one-time treatment, no downtime and no anesthetic is needed.   Until we can just mold ourselves a whole new shape, that’s pretty cool – pun intended.

Say you want a fuller face.  A surgeon sucks out a little fat via needle and syringe or cannula from your belly or hips, then injects it into your cheeks or lips, smoothing wrinkles and restoring a youthful plumpness.  Since the cells were yours to begin with, there’s no chance of allergic reaction or rejection.  Sounds like stealing from the rich and giving to the poor, doesn’t it?

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Still, fat grafting is the lowest rated procedure at RealSelf.com, primarily because of its unpredictability.  Fat is living tissue and has to be kept alive to properly plump its new location.  Fat grafting involves harvesting, processing and re-injecting, and some of the fat cells are going to die during the process. The question is, just what percentage will become useless.  As one plastic surgeon on RealSelf put it, it is highly dependent on technique.  Another variable is that the fat could be reabsorbed into your body, and the so-called experts can’t seem to agree whether the results are permanent.

Additionally, if you want to kick up a little controversy, get a few plastic surgeons together and ask about fat transfer for breast augmentation. In 2007, the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery and the American Society of Plastic Surgeons came out against the procedure for breast enlargement, because there is little or no data that shows it is better or safer than using silicone or saline implants.  Some doctors also argue that if the transferred fat dies, it can leave behind scar tissue or calcifications. It can also hamper cancer screenings, and it remains a hot-button issue..

From people who have had it done, however, especially in their cheeks and hands, fat grafting usually wins high praise.  Some recent studies show that because the fat is rich in mature stem cells, fat grafts to your face and cheeks may improve your complexion.  It is outpatient surgery, requiring a day or two of downtime to allow the harvest sites to heal.    The cost of the procedure varies widely, not only by region and surgeon, but also depending on where you having the injections (lips will be less than butts).

For more information, PlasticSurgery.com is a good resource.

Then why does photorejuvenation keep cropping up on spa menus and dermatology specialty lists?

Sometimes spelled with two words, photorejuvenation is a jabberwocky process that covers a broad spectrum of skin care.  “Photo” in this case, is a combination form of speech meaning light or energy – in other words, this is another laser technology. The rejuvenation reflects the depth and intensity of the treatment.

It is used for a wide range of skin treatments from erasing birthmarks and tattoos to reducing fine lines and acne scars.  It is minimally-invasive and treats only the needed areas while leaving the surrounding tissue intact.  It is typically performed on the face, but we have read about photorejuvenation being used to treat the neck, chest and hands as well.

Used as an anti-aging technique, the basic process involves infrared light from LED lamps that heat the top layer of skin, which results in skin cell stimulation and regeneration. Collagen and elastin are supposedly produced in this procedure, which causes the skin to be smooth where it was wrinkled, bright where it was dull, tight where it was loose (basically the same effect the dryer has on your jeans.)  There is no discomfort and depending on the surface area to be treated, it can take anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour.  But the downtown is almost non-existent.  The work goes on beneath the skin, so a client can return to normal activities within a day.

When used to treat more serious issues like acne scars or rosacea, photorejuvenation processes are intensified by the laser technology.  Heat-based (thermal) or intense pulsed light (IPL) energy devices can be used in conjunction with topical treatments or even chemical peels.

Minimally invasive can also mean minimal results, and that’s the bad news about photorejuvenation.  The good news is that the technology is constantly changing and improving, the cost relatively low – anywhere from $1000-$3000, and if you aren’t satisfied with the results, you may have the procedure again.

By that time, they may have a whole new jabberwocky way of describing it.

• Consumer Guide to Plastic Surgery has a physician’s roundtable discussion on the procedure.
• American Health and Beauty can give you a list of doctors in your area that perform photorejuvenation.